I got a look at myself in a mall mirror. Perspective is everything when you think you're doing good....and then reality hits. I haven't been to the mall since before the start of cold/flu season. (You'd be surprised what disgusting things are floating around in that circulated air, let alone on surfaces with crawling, drooling children!) So Tuesday the in-laws were here for a visit and we went off to the mall to get mother-in-law a new pair of glasses and shoes and a stop at the book store for us. Note: I go in for childrens books, the kids find their usuals. Fire marshall diecast car and diecast airplane with opening doors for the boy, a stuffed purple turtle for the girl. Sigh...
As I was walking around while the mother-in-law was shoe-browsing, I got a peek at my profile in a mirror. Bubble butt, spare tire poking out the front that refuses to budge...legs looked decent enough...but ohhh...the unmistakeable proof of a lax last couple of weeks on my face. The puffy face and double chin is a giveaway for sure. The first place I show it is in my face...then my stomach. The stomach I can hide better than the face. Not. Good. Reminded me of being 9 months pregnant, ready to produce this full-sized baby (and by full-sized I mean one kid was 6.14oz and the other was 5.75oz so most of it was ALL me!) and then you get home and think you look fantastic in your pre-maternity clothes!! That's not real. That's not good. You were still a fat-ass before you got pregnant and your pre-maternity clothes should never have been in your closet either because YOU should never have been that size either. A little perspective, yessiree.
I think it's impossible to eat rabbit food, drink the correct amount of water, work out, maintain a household and homeschool all while keeping your sanity and NOT drop at least one of those balls occasionally. Well, I've dropped a few recently. Can't do it all at once. So the water-drinking went out the window. I didn't pay attention to my food choices that much. I worked out only three times last week. Not enough to make a dent in the bubble butt or the spare tire or the fat face.
I keep reading that writing down what you eat and what you do to work out helps keep you honest. Perspective and some honesty. That's what I need. Do I want to be honest on paper? Absolutely not. But I know I consume empty calories that need to be cut out. I need to pick and choose the calories that are most important. I also need to increase the calories burned. So I need to write down what I do for exercise. Blogging every day just wasn't happening. Another thing I need to write down is water intake. You'd think it would be silly to write down how much water but when it's such a problem...yes, it needs to get written down. So I'm breaking out a spiral notebook that has "Vacation ideas" written on the cover from yester-year (I had half a page of ideas for vacations on continents I'll only see in educational videos for the time being. That page is now replaced with what I've poured into my gut.)
I have several projects I'm working on at the moment...but the body is a constant work-in-progress. Time to shuffle the priorities a bit, at least for the next month or two and start getting honest on paper. Maybe the next time I catch my profile in a mall mirror I'll see a smile on a slimmer face. ;-)
